So you want to make a big change to your body? Or do you…? You think you do .. you really do. To coin a very common cliché’, you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired - but let’s face it – you’ve already been sick and tired many times before. There’s a cycle going on in there and you probably already know what it is. It could look something like this;

1.       Reality Hits

·         Caught sight of yourself in a photograph and thought, “Holy crap!!! What the hell happened to me??? I look ginormous!!!”

·         Hopped on the scales after spending the last 6 months loudly dispelling the scales with comments such as, “not a true indicator”, “stupid”, “doesn’t take into account muscle” .. all the while knowing that the true reason you’re giving them a wide berth is because you just know the results will shock you more than you care to imagine.

·         Someone thoughtless but probably non-malicious comment by a random associate about your figure got you thinking and your mind just wouldn’t let it go.

·         You went to the Doctor and they told you it’s time to shape up before you ship out.

2.       The Decision

·         A 12 week challenge – Michelle Bridges, a local gym, a park-based fitness program or a personal trainer – these are the most common options.

·         A diet – weight watchers, lite and easy, Jenny Craig – you know the ones – they dictate what to eat and when and may even send you some ‘yummy’ dehydrated packages to nuke and eat.

·         A shake or pill – Terry Whatshisname from the Chemist, a Herbalife or Isagenix distributor, the fat burning section of your local supplement shop, Optifast…. So many more that in this list…

·         A trainer – personal trainer generally but sometimes a holistic style of trainer who incorporates meditation and life-coaching

·         A book – covering all aspects of Diet, Nutrition, Fat-loss, Paleo, Ketones … have I hit the trendy buzzwords??

·         A program found in a magazine – 12 Days To A Flat Stomach, 4 Weeks To Thin Thighs, 8 Days to Your Dream Bikini Bod – I could go on…. But I won’t.

3.       The Action

·         You sign up online and pay the Challenge fee. Access immediately given to programs, diets, online support chat forums.

·         You order your first set of pre-made meals and the countdown is on for them to arrive. 3 weeks until that courier delivers your precious parcels of 99% low fat, no sugar food.

·         You head to the chemist or the local stockist and before you know it you’ve got an armful of pills or powders that promise to supress your appetite while leaving you feeling like a box of fluffy ducks and while the fat is literally melting off you at an alarming rate of knots.

·         You enquire at the gym and make that first PT appointment and you wait in nervous anticipation for that initial training session where your PT will speak their magic and the world will be at One.

·         You head to the bookshop or scour the net and before you know it, you’re knee deep in pages of words that attempt to excite and enlighten you for your journey to a better bod.

·         You buy the magazines with the best tag lines and, for once, you bypass the latest news on the Kardashians and head straight into the daily food plans and the workout programs that all look surprisingly easy for the pretty girl in the Lorna Jane tights who is kindly teaching you’re your new go-to moves.

4.       7-10 Days In – Things are Happening..

·         There seems to be an awful lot of reading in the online Challenge business, and the chat forums get kinda annoying and very time consuming.

·         The pre-made meals arrive and, well, the truth is that not all of them taste too great. Some do but they are wayyyy too small and the cost is weighing on your mind. How can you justify spending that much on food each week …

·         The pills were great on Day 1. Still going strong on Day 2. Day 3 and they are getting a little annoying and they are get stuck in your throat some mornings. Why o why are fish oil tabs so big by the way?? The powders also started out great and those shakes were the most filling thing you’ve every ‘eaten’. For the first 5 days you didn’t feel the least bit sorry for yourself, whipping out that big glass of thick chocolate sludge while everyone around you was chowing down on their mince and pasta bake. By Day 8, those shakes are tasting just fractionally chemical and they are not quite hitting the spot in the tummy stakes either. You find yourself drinking your shake and having a little top-up snack on the side.

·         The PT at the gym is great … but they work you a little too hard and they seem somewhat unsympathetic to the fact that you are sore and don’t enjoy plyometrics very much. Work seems to be getting busier and the small thought is forming like a little acorn in your mind, “perhaps I don’t really need a trainer…. I could do this myself … besides – it costs a lot and I’m sure that I could use the money better if I bought myself some gear and did home workouts”.

·         The self-help books are butt-boring and too scientific for the layman.

·         The Kardashian stories become more appealing than the diet stories and, in your heart of hearts, you realise that the health editor of the women’s mags doesn’t really have the best qualifications for changing your body – especially in 8 days

5.       The Cycle

·         An event occurs and the new regime abruptly stops. Main culprits: Weddings, Holidays, Planned Dinner Out, Party, Christmas, Easter, Birthday, Public Holiday.

·         Money runs out to renew subscriptions to mags, books, online groups, pt sessions.

·         The shakes and pills make you actually sick.

Or my all-time favourite

·         The 12 Week Challenge Ends – predictably at the end of 12 Weeks

What’s My Point?

I come into contact with people regularly – constantly – that want to change. They never say they want to change for 12 weeks or even 6 months – they tell me they want to make big changes, presumably forever. I rarely believe them. Harsh? Probably. That does not mean I don’t think it’s possible – of course it is! Every single person has the power to change their own circumstances – that is a point NOT in dispute. But do I think most people have the goods to follow their changes in the long-term? No.

I guess I sort of hope my viewpoint may stir up some indignation. Some sense of being pissed off at me. A flaming desire to prove me wrong. That’s what I’d like to come out of this. Get mad and get even – I can take it! But you’ll need some guts and determination so if you don’t you need not apply.

I reckon I have the right to lay down the challenge. I spent my teenage life glugging beer, puffing fags, sitting on my fat arse and eating anything I could that made me feel nice. And when I decided I wanted to lose weight I followed every magazine diet I could find, chewed on laxative bars to the point where I would rather die than eat fennel, spent months eating nothing but carrots and oranges, spent even more months binging on sugar, chewed pills, went to Weight Watchers, baked cakes without even licking my finger, ate whole cakes without even baking them first – and pretty much everything in between. I was in a constant state of eating too much or too little and swung from being in the 40kg range to the 90kg range. I was unrecognisable at each end of that scary spectrum.

So I do speak from experience. Unfortunately.

And I know the keys to success. They aren’t hard actually, but you have to want it enough. And most don’t.

What You Should Know

·         You can’t make changes without making changes

·         You can’t carry on as you are and make changes

·         People around you will need to realise you are making changes – if they don’t even notice, then you aren’t making any

·         You will need to learn to say “yes” or “no” where you haven’t previously said those words

·         You will need to prioritise change – not with lip service – not with the usual moans of “I wish I could.. but I can’t”, “if only…”, “one day..” blah blah blah – I’ve heard it all – just means you aren’t ready

·         You will feel uncomfortable during changes – and so might the people around you

·         If you are losing weight – you WILL feel hungry – Yep – YOU WILL

·         Exercise is tiring – accept that you will earn your tv time – but being sick and tired is more tiring in the long term

·         Injuries do NOT stop you exercising – they just mean you need to adapt

·         Sore knees and being unable to squat or lunge do NOT mean you can’t make a whole body change  - there are so many other ways to skin that cat!

·         “I just don’t prioritise myself – I’m always looking after everyone else” – is an unusual cliché that I don’t believe. It’s convenient and sounds pretty darn self-less – but I don’t buy it. For so many reasons.

·         Eating well costs the same as eating shit – because you aren’t constantly buying out. Come one – let’s get a little honest on that one! Fresh veg and fruit is definitely more expensive than packaged or processed foods – but the lattes, muffins and McDonalds add up quite quickly….

·         If you are getting older – an affliction that hits .. well.. all l of us – there are two things that will have you considering your physical health and wellbeing.

o   Your own quest to being healthy, or

o   Your doctor

I guarantee one will eventually get you thinking…

I’m not one to mince words and I tend to be a little controversial so why stop now?